Signs

Tomorrow we will "counter-protest" the sad misfits representing the Westboro Baptist Church coming all the way from Kansas to protest Corona Del Mar High School's production of Rent.

From what I have learned, the brainwashed Fred Phelps groupies seek nothing more than publicity and media attention for their misguided leader. It is vital that whatever we do, we do not engage with these people. It would be a waste of time and energy. It would be as reasonable as trying to have a sound conversation with someone in the midst of a full-blown psychotic episode.

At the same time, this is our opportunity to show Orange County that we will not tolerate hate speech of any kind, even if it comes from people whose judgment is severely impaired, or from people whose beliefs we cannot respect.

The fact is that while we know they are crazy, or sad, or misguided, or brainwashed... and we know their message is preposterous, there are young people who will hear their taunts and see their signs. I have spent 5 years providing mental health counseling to college students and another 5 before that, doing the same with high school students. These young people are at the age where they are starting, hopefully, to form their own ideas about who they are, about the world, and about how they will fit into that world. Some are gay and lesbian, some are straight, maybe some are bisexual, transgender, queer, questioning, maybe some believe there is no need to define themselves by their sexual orientation. (I even had a student tell me once that she was "polysexual" meaning she did not discriminate based on gender. Oh what the future holds.) Some are frightened, angry, or sad. Some walk around all day long looking down, speak only when necessary, eat lunch alone, and have nobody to text when the bell rings. Others do everything they can to be a part of the popular crowd.

What happens when they hear these nut-jobs scream out at them that "God Hates Fags" and see the awful hateful signs? Are they going home to parents who tell them "these people are ludicrous" or are they going to parents who tell them that "well, these folks are a bit extreme, but we know that homosexuality is a sin, don't we?" Or are they going home to parents who are too busy to discuss this stuff, too preoccupied with their own problems? Will seeing and hearing "God Hates Fags" reinforce the already unnecessary shame shouldered by a young gay or lesbian 16 year-old, or fuel the anger of a brooding outcast, or a frightened homophobic (and maybe gay) football player? Maybe some kids will be repelled, maybe, hopefully, some will be motivated to action to stop hate and promote equality. Maybe some will think it is cool and check out wbc and find in this group a kind of acceptance they have never before experienced.

For me, I think I got most riled up about this issue when I read that story about Carl Joseph Walker-Hoover, the 11 year-old who hanged himself after experiencing endless bullying and homophobic taunts. http://www.glsen.org/cgi-bin/iowa/all/news/record/2400.html And there was another young boy who did the same within the last week. The connection is direct.

So what is our job tomorrow? It certainly is not to engage in any way with the wbc people. We cannot change their minds. We do not want to draw attention to them or their message. Yet we cannot stand back and let them hold up their ridiculous signs unopposed. I found this as I was searching for ways to frame my message:

The book of Proverbs, Chapter 26:4-5, says two things about someone who refuses wisdom:

“Do not answer fools according to their folly, or you will be a fool yourself.” And,
"Answer fools according to their folly, or they will be wise in their own eyes.”

(http://project12.wordpress.com/2008/12/03/project-12-response-to-god-hates-fags-chicago-area-protests/)

What does this mean? It seems to me it means we should not do what they do or do it the way they do it but again we should do something. It reminds me of Audre Lorde’s "The Master's Tools Will Never Dismantle the Master's House." (Who wrote “The book of Proverbs, Chapter 26:4-5” anyway? Perhaps it was it a Black Lesbian Feminist? Like God?)

So we have to use our own tools tomorrow and always. We have to be creative, and positive and disengage from the hate. We have to drown out the hate with love and support and we have to demonstrate not simply tolerance but RADICAL ACCEPTANCE.

I highly recommend these videos too.
http://www.safeschoolscoalition.org/movies/AloneTogether.html
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BUDc3ZWYq2I

So let’s come up with some signs suited for the day and reflective of who we are and who we wish are children to become. I have been thinking of a few and I would love to hear from all of you out there as well.

Here are some ideas:
• OCEC supports Rent and the Brave Students at CDM High
• OCEC Loves Rent
• God Loves Musical Theater
• OCEC Supports Rent Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes (of course, from Rent…).
• How about Love (from Rent, Seasons of Love)
• OCEC/We/I support the students in Rent at CDM High Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minutes.
• We are all the same
• Love Never Fails
• God Loves Equality
• The Greatest of These is Love

Just some thoughts. The song lyrics from Rent provide lots of good ideas.

An update: We are now engaged in a Phelps-a-Thon. When the Phelps group comes to Newport Beach to protest at Corona del Mar High School, they will actually be raising money for LGBT equality. http://www.phelps-a-thon.com/Home.html

What a great way to dismantle the house of hatred! So if you cannot come protest, can you spare a few bucks? I promise if you give OCEC your money it will piss those whackos off!

I hope to see you and all you beautiful signs there.